1) you will not have DVD-A digitally from 800 to 861. You will not have upsapled DD and DTS.
2) Yes they work. You will get your OA12 swapped for a OA12m module (free of charge) New OA13 will cost you, and can be used for 2+2+2 only now (only a hand full of DVD-A discs are out in 2+2+2)
3) The IE16 card is swapped for a IE42 card. That might do its work better ? Further the Z3 processor cards is swapped for a CD20 card (more horsepower) and algorimts are done in 48 bit precission i think.
4) Have no 800, but i think you get DVD-A support as the major feature. Further the smart link between the 800 and 861 sends extra data, so the 861 will know which preset to load for CD, DVD-V or DVD-A
5) Fascia for the 861 is not needed i think. It costs a lot (around $2000 per 8xx unit)
The 800 will get more lights i think, but as i do not own a 800 i cannot tell for sure. Other members can tell you the difference.
Jaco